Bad DecisionsSeptember 26, 2019
Strength in MusicOctober 10, 2019
My Mom believed that what you would say and how you thought had the power to help you or condemn you. She believed that in the literal sense. I grew up realizing the power of words. I knew from early on, that when I elected to use that power negatively, I could deeply hurt the intended individual. It was shameful behaviour and I am not proud of it. I own the hurt that I caused and will continue to make amends.
With this understanding, I started to write down what I hoped for from the universe. If you could view my old journals, I know that you would find them a mingled mess of humor, sadness, pain, desire, and a self-loathing view of my life as I saw it. I wanted the universe to change me in order to satisfy the needs of others. With time, I learned to love myself, outside and in.
My current asks to the Universe are steeped in love, sadness, and hope. Below are a few of mine which I wrote down and spoke out loud, on Saturday August 31st, 2019.
- A happy, healthy and emotionally strong Emma
- BreakFree23 to help as many people as possible
- The means for me to help as many people that I can
- For my Mom to forgive me
- Eric and I to continue to grow, learn, love, respect, care, endure and connect with each other for 1000 years. (I know it sounds long. It’s an inside thing between E and I)
- A relationship with my daughter which is loving, healthy, honest, and respectful
A list can tell you a lot about a person. It is clear where my mind is at right now. I urge you to write down your hopes. They are not for the eyes of others, unless you wish to share. Please remember that our community is our safe space.